Contrary to what we are led to believe by books and movies, true love is not something that just happens. Both sides must put equal effort and pick up the ropes when the other one is unable to do so. Making a relationship work takes patience, forgiveness, understanding and more importantly just love.
However, when you are in your initial dating days, it is difficult to anticipate what the other individual brings to the table.
Sometimes it doesn’t take long to figure out if this relationship is worth the energy or not. But more often than not, you have to give it time, understand each other’s flaws and accept them if the love is real.
Lucky for you, mixed signals are a great sign at the beginning of any relationship to realize whether or not your partner will even put the effort needed for you. What are mixed signals you ask?
Mixed signals can simply be miscommunication—your partner tries to express one set of feelings, and it comes out wrong. They can also be intentional, like the dude who’s keeping you on the back burner while he waits to see if someone “better” comes along. But no matter the reason for the mixed signals, they definitely add a new layer of stress and frustration to dating.
If you notice any of the mixed signals from your partner as mentioned below, do yourself a favor and say NO to that relationship!
Bare Minimum Communication
Of course, you don’t expect someone to be in touch with you 24*7 or give you updates by the minute but it would definitely keep the flame burning in a relationship if both of you keep checking on each other, asking about each other’s day, spend quality time, etc.
But if your “significant” other replies to your messages a day or two later and is not as interested in how you spend your day, this person is being convenient and you need to be away from him/her.
Hot and Cold Behaviour
Do they often go from being completely smitten with you to becoming utterly cold towards you? If so, they might be taking their time with this relationship or keeping their alternatives open. There is unease on the other side in either case.
Although it might not be detrimental to the relationship, it would be helpful to understand what is going through that person’s mind. If it really annoys you, you should talk to them and make things right.
Not Exclusive With You
Seeing your partner flirting with someone else or not acknowledging you as their boyfriend/girlfriend in social situations might be very confusing. To prevent problems in a relationship, it’s critical to have the same goals.
You should explain the situation to them in order to be on the same page to understand if the both of you want the same things from this relationship. They might not be as prepared for the relationship as you are if they continue to be casual about it.
All Words, No Action
It can be annoying if a person you are seeing makes plans but doesn’t carry them out. Once or twice in situations where he/she is busy is understandable but your partner needs to respect your time and feelings as well. You should talk to them about this if their words don’t match their deeds. Their egotistical actions may eventually harm your bond.
Over Possessive
If he/she is someone who calls you all the time to know about your whereabouts, does not understand that you need your own space, is not appreciative of the fact that you deserve to spend time with your own friend circle and attempts to have the upper hand in the relationship by being dominating, my advice is RUN! Checking your phone, keeping a tab on you and not trusting you easily are big red flags.
No Emotional Connect
A relationship is not all fun and games and sometimes it gets down to being real and having vulnerable conversations about your past, your experiences, your goals and your future ahead.
Your partner is someone who must contribute to making life easier and happier and not the opposite. So if you are unable to have a meaningful and emotional connection with your partner then it is time you evaluate the possibilities.
Romantic Gestures Out of Nowhere
Experts say there are two possible explanations for this: either they are trying to get your attention for doing something kind for you, or they are feeling guilty. Assuming the first explanation, try to show your partner that they are appreciated so that they feel acknowledged and loved and contribute more positively to the relationship.
Conclusion
It is always good to identify such mixed signals and take action accordingly before it gets too late in any relationship. Do not get disheartened by these things. As mentioned at the beginning of this article, love takes patience and hard work and why would you want to spend your energy loving someone who was not willing to put that effort in for you?
In today’s day and age when so many factors play a key role in finding someone new and dating someone new, it is highly recommended to be aware and more knowledgeable of the Dos and Don’ts of a relationship. Lastly, whatever it takes, do it gracefully with your dignity and self-respect upheld.
